This article was originally published on Kueez
Those Laundry Woes
Transitioning from mom and dad's house to your own pad involves some new responsibility. One chore we had to learn was laundry, and it involved some trial and error. But what if you reach professional life and still have no idea what you're doing? Rachel had to confront her fears about separating whites and colors in One With the East German Laundry Detergent (season 1, Episode 5). Luckily, Ross was by her side with the know-how, the detergent, and the experience.
Many may not recall that this was their first-ever date. Rachel does make a classic mistake by missing one red sock and turning all her whites pink. But then, she kisses Ross for all his help!
When Your Friends Are Too Rich
In many cases, we have very different finances thaמ our friends. But that's usually not why we hang out with them, and it shouldn't matter. On occasion, the disparities do show. Monica, Ross, and Chandler are pitted against the rest of the gang in The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant (season 2 Episode 5). To celebrate a promotion, the three buy concert tickets to Hootie and the Blowfish. Pricy concert tickets!
Rachel, Phoebe, and Joey think the pressure is inconsiderate. Their jobs pay far less, and it's not fun for them to join in if they have to go broke. Who can't relate to this struggle?
No Plan for the Future
Planning for the future seems like the wise thing to do. But if you're a bohemian guitar artist in NYC, you might not do a lot of that. We see this in Phoebe when she lies on the ground and says she doesn't have a plan. She says she doesn't even have a 'pla'. Not only does she not have all four letters, she lacks even three. It's silly but we got the point!
It's a good thing she hung out with more motivated girlfriends. As you may remember, Monica was a chef, and Rachel became a fancy buyer in fashion. We hope she got some inspiration!
It's Hard to Share Your Food
Sharing is caring, as they say. But that's easier said than done, especially if you are a foodie with a strong appetite. Joey certainly fit that category, and we weren't surprised to see that he had trouble being generous when it came to his food. In season ten in The One With The Birth Mother, Phoebe sets him up on a date with her friend, Sarah. But he doesn't want to call her back, afterward. Why not?
It seems she took a few fries from his plate. This really bugged him, and we are not surprised. Sure, Joey liked the ladies, but the man had an endless stomach!
Lazy Is Your Top Priority
A big theme on the show was high-strung Monica trying to motivate her Chandler to do more. Both had full-time jobs, but they had different ideas about what time off meant. Monica liked to get out and be active. She was successful at dragging him along sometimes, but Chandler had a stubborn, lazy side. Once, when she asked him to work out, he replied: "I would, but that might get in the way of my lying around time."
Many of us can see ourselves in that quote. Who wants to go to the gym on the weekend? Besides fitness nuts, a lot of us really do treasure lying around, and nothing more.
When Someone Eats Your Sandwich
When we are responsible enough to pack our meal for work, we do expect it will be safe in the fridge. Ross became enraged when someone at work snuck his sandwich without his permission. At a meeting with his boss, he exclaimed: "Look, I am 30 years old, I'm about to be divorced twice and I just got evicted! That sandwich was the only good thing going on in my life! Someone ate the only good thing going on in my life!"
We can relate to his pain. We bet you can, too! Sometimes, there is nothing better going on than your favorite sandwich. Whether it's pastrami or peanut butter and jelly, the comfort is undeniable.
Dates Just for Free Food
The characters on the show lived in a time before Tinder. We think that app would have made a lot of funny storylines in an alternate universe. Would Phoebe have been a serial swiper? Would she have been a ghoster? We do recall a time when she admitted she was only going on dates to eat nice meals in NYC. On one occasion, she explained: "He may not be my soulmate, but a girl's gotta eat!"
It's sad, but true: There are women who actually use dates just to dine out on someone else's dime. We hope that doesn't happen too often, though.
Never Hang up on Your Friends
Joey doesn't often lose his temper. But on one occasion, he just couldn't hold back. When he witnessed Rachel hang up on a pizza shop, he became infuriated. Why? Well, in his opinion, you just don't do that to the people who support you most. And for Joey, the guys who made him his beloved pizza certainly qualified. He exploded: "You hung up on the pizza place? I don't hang up on your friends!"
For some, pizza is a delicious meal. For others, it's a serious topic and a passion. We definitely know where Rachel and Joey stand!
Love Triangle Trainwreck
These days, dating apps mean we have way too many options. It's hard to make any commitment! Back in the day of Friends, things were less extreme. But human nature was still real, and Ross found himself torn between two ladies in The One With the List (season 2 Episode 8). He was interested in Julie and Rachel at the same time, and he had no idea how to pick. What was his solution?
Ross ended up writing a literal list of pros and cons. Julie is an archeologist, which fits well with his paleontology interests. Rachel is gorgeous and fun. In the end, he dumps Julie and she feels used. This seems familiar, doesn't it?
Drinking in the Morning
Five days of work a week can be stressful, no doubt. But modern life requires a lot of hours at the office, especially if you want to make the rent in a city like NYC. Chandler had a grown-up job he disliked. He wanted to show up drunk to get through the day, if possible. He explained: "I want to start drinking in the morning. Don't say I don't have goals!"
We can relate to that. How many of us have had jobs just to pay bills, with little personal satisfaction? Friends covered every topic, including beer in the morning. We don't really advise it, though!
Debating Money As a Gift
When it's time to show you care, most Americans give physical gifts for birthdays and holidays. There is an entire industry around colorful bags, wrapping paper, and bows. But some cultures actually prefer to give an envelope of money on those special days, to let you choose what you want. It's their version of the gift card, perhaps. On Friends, a debate erupted around the practice. Monica didn't like it at all!
It's not that she wanted to receive expensive, hand-picked items. She envisioned a different idea, perhaps influenced by her role as a chef. She explained: “Money is so impersonal. Cookies say someone really cares."
When You Have Social Anxiety
While some of us are social butterflies 24/7, others need a beer to get started at a party. We know who we are! On Friends, Chandler openly admitted to Monica that he had social anxiety. He explained: “When I first meet somebody, it's usually panic, anxiety, and a great deal of sweating.” Despite all his witty one-liners mocking others, he had his own self-conscious side. That's often how it goes, right?
Shy viewers at home agreed it is tricky to meet new people. For them, this made Chandler the most relatable character on the show. We loved his honesty on the subject!
When You're a Rage-A-Holic
Ross Geller had more than his fair share of anger issues on the show. Unlike laidback Joey or free-spirited Phoebe, he had a lot of trouble winding down when he got triggered. We all remember his big blow-ups and temper tantrums over mandate problems. It seemed like Ross could never quote let things go. On one occasion, he explained: “When I die, some people are going to get seriously haunted."
Despite his extremes, Ross was a really smart guy and had a sweet side, as well. His friends often didn't understand why he was so upset, and that hurt. We can relate if we think about it. Minimizing our pain would make us angrier, too!
Life Can Be so Tiring
Phoebe wasn't exactly a stable professional on the show. Sometimes, she sang at the cafe for tips. Zany artists have to make the rent with their creativity, and we understood this friend was living life unconventionally. Most of the time, it seemed like she enjoyed it. But the real world is an exhausting place, and even Phoebe had her limits. Once, she lamented: “Ugh it’s so exhausting, waiting for death."
Waiting for death? That's a pretty dark way to look at life, Phoebe! We think it was probably just a low period when things got overwhelming. We've had those, too!
We All Need an Adult Fort
When we were kids, we loved building forts out of pillows and blankets. As adults, we don't get a lot of opportunities to get silly like that. But Chandler and Joey never agreed to grow up. We saw this side of them in The One Where Ross Moves In in season five. When Ross was kicked out by Emily, he came to temporarily live with the guys. They rearranged his boxes to create a man fort of sorts. How fun is that?
All three got dressed up in costumes and moved the TV into the space. We all secretly have an urge to leave our obligations and just be a kid again. This is one way we can do that!
Roommates Are Terrible
College is the time to have roommates and learn about yourself and other people. But beyond that, most people want a place of their very own. Ross is one of those people, and he enjoyed his space as a free man. In The One With the Monkey in season one, he showed up with a monkey out of the blue. It was a white-headed capuchin monkey named Marcel. Our hearts melted!
As cute as he was, this animal was an exotic illegal pet. The friends urged Ross just to get a roommate, instead. No, he explained. After a certain age, it's just pathetic. He kind of has a point?
When Your Geeky Side Wins
Many of us were ridiculed for being geeky, nerdy, or awkward in school. These qualities were bad, the world told us. But on Friends, we learned another lesson through laughs. There were many times that the characters embraced these aspects of themselves. Ross and Monica, for example, danced like weirdos all night in The One With the Routine from season six. The rest of the bunch made fun of them, but they decided to be authentic.
.This wasn't new for Ross, of course. He pursued a career in paleontology throughout the entire series as the other five laughed at him. Why was being a dinosaur professor a bad thing? To this day, we side with nerdy Ross.
We All Like Trees
Phoebe is an environmentalist, and she always had a problem with the Xmas tree tradition. In The One Where Rachel Quits in season three, she joined Joey to buy some proper holiday cheer. But she couldn't stay silent. She explained: "I am against innocent trees being cut down in their prime, and their, their corpses grotesquely dressed in like tinsel and twinkly lights...Those trees were born to be Christmas trees, their fulfilling their life purpose, by, by making people happy."
Every Christmas, millions of fresh, green pines are cut down for use in the home. We feel a need to decorate them, whether it's wasteful or not. Maybe she has a point!
When Your Buddies Bail
We saw a big disagreement among the friends in The One Where No One’s Ready (Season 3 Episode 2). No matter how close a group may be, there will be times when priorities don't line up. In this storyline, Ross wanted company at a black-tie benefit at the museum. While everyone initially agreed, it seemed that they got flaky as the day drew nearer. When it was time to leave, no one was even dressed. How frustrating!
We looked at this scenario with a sigh, because we've experienced it ourselves. People are such commitment-phobes these days, and everything is about instant gratification. Can't anyone make a plan and stick to it?
Struggling with Fertility
Society has changed over the past few decades when it comes to women in the workplace. With more and more female participation, it's not a shock that motherhood is often pushed off to a later stage. The consequence of that is fertility issues, for millions. Monica showed us that this can happen on Friends. At the time, it wasn't a topic on TV very often. Her struggles alongside Chandler really opened our eyes!
According to WebMD: "Women are born with a set number of eggs. That number drops as they age, making it harder for them to get pregnant after they reach their mid-30s. By 40, their chances of getting pregnant drop from 90% to 67%. By age 45, it's just 15%."
Bubble Bath TLC
When it comes to self-care, we all have a guilty pleasure. Some of us like retail therapy, a euphemism for spending way too much money at the mall. Some people like to get massages, manicures, or pedicures. Chandler had his own at-home routine. It wasn't something he wanted to admit as a man. But in one episode, he was caught in the act, and he had to own it. What was he doing?
He was taking a bubble bath! It is definitely a relaxing experience. But very few guys want to get involved. They take manly showers, but we wonder: Are they missing out?
Romantic Anxiety Is Real
It's hard to let our nerves go and be ourselves on a first date. No one understands that better than Monica, who admits to having romantic anxiety on the show Although we see her in a number of relation shops over the years, we can't forget that it was hard for her at the beginning. A major storyline on Friends was her massive weight loss since her teen years. We wonder if that still affected her as an adult. Odds are, it did!
Dropping those pounds will get you a lot of new attention, quick. But we can see how the anxiety around romance might take longer to lose: Monica is a human being, after all.
Getting That Sunday Rest In
On Sundays, some go to church, and others go out for a round of golf. There are all sorts of ways people spend their weekends. When it comes to Chandler, though, his idea of a restful day is literally not moving. He feels that on this day of the week, no one can reasonably expect him to move from his seat. On one occasion, Monica shows up to go jogging. Chander refuses, just on the basis that it is Sunday. That would require moving!
We may not be as extreme as Chandler, but it is refreshing to just have a day where no one expects you to move. Maybe his policy is a good idea!
Debating Maiden Names
In the old days, women always took their husband's last name. In recent times, there has been more debate about why that practice is appropriate. Some say that the tradition should continue, while others say the woman should keep her own identity. When Chandler and Monica started discussing marriage, this issue came up. Monica decided she wanted to keep her name as it was. But not for ideological reasons, she explained.
Monica just hated his name, and we get that. At Central Perk, Chandler asked her if she was considering a change after the wedding. Her reply was simple: "Nope. Bing's Weird."
Christmas Card Obligations
To give, or not to give: That is the question. We don't know if it's required to send Xmas cards in the digital age. But on Friends, the characters lived in a simpler time. It was totally normal to send out physical greetings during the holiday season. In The One With Ross's Step Forward, Ross gets a totally reasonable question from his girlfriend, Mona. When are they going to send out a couple's card?
Well, he refuses. Is it because he doesn't like the tradition? As it turned out, no: He just wasn't ready, from a relationship standpoint. Mona really caught him off guard, with that one. It happens!
Life Can Be a Mystery
It was never totally clear what Chandler did every day at work. There were hints throughout the series, something about statistical analysis and data reconfiguration. He didn't seem to like it, whatever it really was. Over time, he gets promotions and even becomes a boss. But there is a feeling that something is missing. He shared: "I don't know what I'm gonna do with my life." Haven't we all thought that, from time to time?
Perhaps the problem was personal. He just needed to find the love of his life, who turned out to be next to him the whole time. Monica did give him purpose, towards the end. Eventually, he became a dad!
When You Miss Your Mom
Phoebe and her evil twin Ursula had a tragedy in their family. Their mother took her own life, and that had to be tough. When Phoebe finds a stray cat in her suitcase, she seems to think it's a reincarnation of her parent. She explains: "I just have this really strong feeling that this cat is my mother...She was a human lady. This is the spirit of my mom, Lily. The one that killed herself."
Her friends were certainly skeptical, especially since the feline was a male. But quirky Phoebe didn't listen to them and went with her gut. We bet she really missed her mom!
Party Animal Energy
When we are young, there's no party that we will refuse. It's exciting to feel the rush for meeting dozens of new people with pounding music and alcohol. But as we get older, that loses some of its appeal: We've been there, done that. Chandler and Ross figure this out in season 4 in The One Where They’re Going to Party. They go out like the old days, but quickly discover they are the ones who have changed.
Ross feels they are sad and pathetic. But Chandler says: "We're not sad. We're just not 21 anymore. You know? I'm 29 years old, damn it! I want to sit in a comfortable chair, watch TV and go to sleep at a reasonable hour."
Hating the Happy People
When you're feeling down in the dumps, it can be hard to see smiles all around you. Why are they so happy, and what do they know that we don't? Hopefully, that attitude is only temporary. Phoebe definitely suffered from this disconnect on at least a few occasions. She was usually fun to be around, but she was also only human. On one occasion, she looked around and remarked: "Everybody looks so happy. I hate that."
It's not easy to admit, but Phoebe was honest. For many singles in her city, life was unpredictable. Would it all work out, in the end? Fans of the show know the answer!
Alone During The Holidays
Young professionals move all over the country for that perfect job. They also relocate, looking for social adventures in new cities. Isn't it lonely during the holidays, though? In The One With the Girl From Poughkeepsie in season four, Rachel finds herself far away from family during Christmas. Chandler has other complaints, namely that he is missing out on the festivities with his friends. Rachel doesn't agree that's such a problem, though.
Maybe Chandler's relationship with Kathy wasn't perfect. But as Rachel told him: “At least you have somebody to miss stuff with. I hate being alone this time of the year.”
Embracing Your Plan B
Monica and Chandler are a classic Friends couple. But how did it begin? We recall their origins in season seven in The One With the Truth About London. Although they had known each other since high school, they never dated. It was only when Monica went to a hotel room to hook up with Joey that accidentally wound up with Chandler. Sometimes, the best things happen unexpectedly. But Chandler found out!
That's awkward, to be sure. But their fling continued beyond London, and he was the one who married her in the end. At this point, we can't imagine it any other way!
Motivating Pals To Do Better
Our good friends are always there to give us a different perspective. We see a lot of friendly advice in season five in The One With the Inappropriate Sister. Ross listens to Joey going through a tough time as a working actor in NYC. While some might have encouraged him to find a more stable way to make a living, Ross encourages his friend to pursue his dreams. Good friends do that!
Ross also pushes him to write a script, which he had never done. Sometimes, we just need that extra push from someone who believes in us to make things happen. Even confident Joey!
When the New Job Isn't Worth It
Relocating for a dream job is a tough decision for many people. Chandler decided to do that, but he quickly regretted it in The One With Christmas In Tulsa. As a data processing supervisor, he isn't happy to begin with, but the money was tempting. His new location is in Oklahoma. That's a very different situation than NYC, and he doesn't stay for long. One person was too important for him to miss!
That person was Monica, of course. No job was worth giving up his personal goals. When he arrives back, he explains: “It was a stupid job and I could not stand leaving you."
When You're Way Too Organzied
Monica was a neat freak who always liked things done, just so. But because she wanted to have a baby, she was willing to finally be flexible. She theorized: "It's gonna be really scary. I mean, God, when we have a baby there's gonna be so much that we're not able to control. I mean, the apartment's gonna be a mess. I won't have time to clean it. What if the baby gets into the ribbon drawer and messes up all the ribbons? What if there's no room for a ribbon drawer because the baby's stuff takes up all the space? Where will all the ribbons go?"
Most of us will never have this struggle. Monica was clearly above average when it came to perfectionism. Chandler must have been relieved to hear about her new mindset. Toddlers are a messy project!
Admitting No Desire to Help
We all say we would step up to the plate if a friend was in need. That's part of being a good person, right? But in practice, we can be selfish. Phoebe doesn't try to deny this aspect of herself in season seven. When her pals ask her to help out with a boring task, she doesn't even pretend to be interested. She explains: "Oh, I wish I could, but I don't want to."
It sounded callous, to be sure. But being honest is part of friendship, too. We can't do every good deed we are asked to do, right? Perhaps Phoebe understood her limits!